Creative Process: slowing down
there’s no need to go fast, you’re not sonic!
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The concept of working slower has been kind of running through my mind all this year.
With my constant fight with trying to prove that i can finish my projects and fight with family to prove that i am working on something- there is a pressure to produce work as quickly as possible to let people not forget about you.
I dont want to say that i want people to forget about me and my work, especially since im putting in so much work that i want to be seen by the right crowd.
Though- i think working fast comes at the cost of burning myself out- slowing down is my only answer.
Slowing down may mean people will forget about my work or the algorithm not picking up my post. It may kill the hard work I’ve put into my online presence.
If that is the price i have to pay just to slow down… then i will.
Despite it all, there will never be a reason for me to actually want to move fast. I have no external deadline for my projects- all of my deadlines are decided by me!
Many times i have had asked myself “what am i rushing for?”
Usually its for me to say that i need to show people something though that is not true, i can easily say “i have nothing to show for right now, check in with me later”
Rushing comes at the expense of me not enjoying the process and time being spent on crafting ideas,projects, or even space for said thing.
It’s permission i need, i need to give myself permission to slow down.
No one is going to throw a temper tantrum that im not showing any updates on my work right this second.
As much as I love to give updates, i also love communicating what my needs are in the moment.
Slowing down needs to happen on my terms, i have a tendency to overexert my body. It’s not a healthy habit. I will tell people that.
If someone is coming to ME telling me i need to slow down then i know its truly a problem.
Why am i trying to move so fast?
Im not committing to this idea that this is a rat race, for what reason do i need to even participate?
Is that race even where i want to be?
I dont even like running so no. That isnt the space for me.
My wrist starts hollering when im doing my 3 page journal entry.
i sometimes push myself through it because i want it done, but other times, i need to stop and think about what im trying to say.
It feels like my brain is water and my body is the fountain button. I want them to be synchronized in when i want to spill everything out.
I dont want my button to be broken and my brain is just going! when will i slow down? Never, if i dont listen to what my body is saying.
I’ve heard this saying that “slowing down is resistance” and the more i think about it, it is true.
It is privledge to be able to slow down whenever i choose to, but it is also not completely out of someone’s control.
My creative projects are dictated by me- i choose the days when i finish my projects, i choose to push deadlines back whenever i feel like theyre not necessary for me to finish in the moment.
I choose when i tell someone when something is not going to be delivered on time. ( please Say it earlier than later tho)
Same thing goes for moving fast, it must be intentional. I need to make that choice conscientiously. It cannot come from a place of impulsivity.
If i need to slow down then i will, that is non-negotiable.
It’s either that or whatever im rushing will turn out to be crappy.
So it’s time to slow down, whats the rush?
Book talk
The new girls by Cassandra Calin
Scott Pilgrim #volume 2 by bryan lee o’malley
Witchlings- scepter of memories by Claribel A. Ortega
Pixie snippet: plain Jane and the slumber party disaster
Honestly i’m still moving very slowly on this- ha considering what the blog is about! But honestly we’re pretty close to being done with the sketch phase of this comic overall!
Ill be doing some revisions on some pages since some drawings are pretty rushed due to my hand pain unfortunately but i would rather spend some time revising rather than jumping to the next phase!
I want to do some color tests for what i want this comic to look like but I’ll put that in the back of my mind until it’s time to think about it!
Music time
Psst- hey i’m posting more frequently on my YouTube channel, check out my recent video here!
